Holding on to things...some people do it with stuff, others with emotions and still others with people. When its with stuff we call those people hoarders. When it's emotions we say that person is (insert psychological diagnosis here). When it's people its co-dependency. It's the last one that I've been thinking about and trying to work on. If you know me I'm not big on stuff, I live completely behind the 6 month rule of use it or get rid of it. Emotions - I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve these days even though I wish I didn't. But people - that's a hard one for me. There's that overwhelming sense of not wanting to be alone. To want to know that I have my person out there. So in order to feel like that, even though I know that I have people out there, I've been holding onto a person that in all honesty I should have let go awhile ago...probably more like 2 or 3 years ago. But there was something that kept me there in a friendship and relationship that wasn't healthy. I held on because I was afraid to let go because to be without someone seemed to be worse then staying and losing myself more every day. But that's backward logic and I lost a lot of myself in the process. What I thought was great wasn't and I missed some opportunities in the process. I missed being myself most importantly. And I've wanted to hold on to this person because I thought that this was the best that I could do and maybe all I deserved. But in reality I deserve so much more then that. While I feel that I'm closing a door to this person in reality I'm opening the door to myself, to find all of me again and to find what I truly deserve and want in my life. Holding on can be good for a time but it's time to let go and find myself and to hold onto that.
As a minister I have the honor of performing rites and ceremonies for people at a variety of stages of life: baptisms, blessings, marriages, funerals, etc. I usually enjoy planning and leading these events. But lately I've had a rash of folks shocked that as a minister, I would have a fee to do some of these services. So lets talk about why I have fees. To start with, if you are a member of my congregation you do get my services as a part of my contract with the congregation as long as they are spelled out in the contract. Generally if you're a member of the congregation I serve, it is expected that I will preform baptisms, blessings, funerals, weddings, etc for you because I want to remind you of God's continuous blessing in your life and especially at important moments in your life. However some folks are shocked that there would be an honorarium suggested for the minister. The reality is that these blessings, weddings, funerals, etc. are extra work in our wee...
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