Conflict in Church - Part 3

It is often hard to discuss topics in the Church because I see that too often all sides of the argument believe that they know where the other already stands on the issue. "We can't even discuss being an O & A congregation because these people/that person is against it." I'm sure you've heard the sayings. But I think the real question that needs to be asked when these statements go flying around is "Did you really go and talk to this person or are you just assuming you know what they're going to say?" And even if you do go over and talk to another person do you 1) let the person speak, 2) really listen to what they're saying and 3) do it in a non-threatening way? Many issues involving religion and faith are very personal. That's part of what makes faith great is that it is personal. People can arrive at different conclusions for very different reasons and that's okay because it's their faith and it doesn't have to be yours. But this personal aspect gets us in trouble because often times when we think that we're listening to the other, we're actually busy making up our counter-arguments in our head and not respecting the sacred space of being in a honest conversation with someone. And because we are not really being present or listening to the other person we just make assumptions that we can lump a person into the "other" category. This does not unite, this does not help us learn from each other. This just festers the conflicts that run deep in religion today. This just feeds into further breakdown of what I believe God wanted us to create in the "Kin-dom" of God. Maybe instead of yelling at each other and deciding that we have to be right or its an attack on my personal faith we learn to actively listen and be with each other in sacred space and time. Maybe we'd find more common ground.