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Dressing as the Minister - clothing choices edition

So what is the minister suppose to look like? That's a much debated topic. 15 years ago when I encountered my first female pastor and said that I wanted to become a minister myself I was advised that for at least for the first year that I should never let anyone in my congregation see me without a skirt/dress on. A congregation was upset because I generally wear flip flops, not knowing or understanding that my feet are a very odd size and finding shoes that are comfortable to wear is very difficult and frustrating. The pastor of my current congregation has had numerous members come up to him and tell him that he does not look much like a minister because he's wearing a t-shirt and jeans when preaching. So what does or is a minister suppose to look like? Are ministers expected to be always in dress casual clothing? Should I always have a skirt hidden in my desk drawer/car trunk in case someone comes through the door? Should I be spending quality time every week making sure that my dress shoes are polished?

Coming from a youth and children's ministry background and then a hospital chaplain let me tell you that I don't agree with the idea of always being in business casual. If I did that in my 10 plus years of ministry I would have spent enough money to feed a third world country on replacing all of the clothing and shoes that have been destroyed doing ministry. Last time I checked, my pay checks never were that much to cover that type of a clothing bill. I don't see myself changing light bulbs in a skirt either - a task that I've done often in many churches.

So what is the dress code of a minister? Yes I firmly agree that there are times when it's important to look nice - weddings, funerals, etc. - but I also don't believe that just because my office/study is located within the four walls of a congregation that I have to have on dressy clothes. If one thinks of the church as a home then why wouldn't we want to be comfortable in our home? Why do we have to dress to impress Jesus when even Jesus took a break, took off his sandals and enjoying being comfortable? I'm not saying that it needs to be "wear your pajamas to church day" but if I or another pastor feels comfortable in blue jeans and t-shirt then why is that a bad thing? I know that I don't enjoy talking to someone who is dressed way above me. I want to be able to feel comfortable and like I can relate to the person I'm talking too. Clothing is one way that folks are able to look and see if they may have something in common with the other. Running around in suit and tie/skirts and dress clothes doesn't help people feel like they can relate.

So what's the proper response to the comments of "you don't look like a pastor" and/or "you need to wear certain items?" I like asking the question immediately to the person of "well what is a pastor suppose to look like?" The often disarms a person and makes them realize the words that just came out of their mouth. But then the next series of question has to deal with what lies at the base of the assumptions. There are some ministers who are very comfortable always being in Sunday best clothing and that's great for them. I believe that casual clothes are acceptable too. Neither is right or wrong but I think there's room at the table for both.

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