I'm still processing my trip to Kentucky and back. Many things just hit me and I had a lot of time to think while driving (20 hours give or take). I thought, I listened to music - sometimes singing, sometimes just letting the words into my soul, I sat in quiet, I cried, I laughed, I reflected on the creation that was around me. I commented on other people's driving skills or lack there of. I prayed and tried to search for that core of essence within myself. It was a very deep time for me and my soul. I am probably more tired because of the work and searching I was doing then from the driving. But what became clear to me more then anything else on those interstates through corn and soybean fields was that my spirit was, is, being crushed by where I am and what I do. Things and places can help for a time or a season and that's the hard part of figuring out when that time or season have come to an end. Wanting to hold on because of ego crap, to hold on because of fear. It is time to change so my spirit can be free and not smashed into a little box or have pieces chipped away from me. I am scared as hell about what this all means but I guess here goes nothing. What else do I have to lose other then my spirit right?
Happy New Year's Eve! 2024 is almost gone as I type this. And it's been ... a year. To whomever may be reading this know this: I'm glad you made it through 2024. You're you and you're here. That's enough. Whether you met your goal/goals or not, you survived. You're still breathing - even if it's hard to do sometimes. I'm proud of you. Keep going. Even if all you can manage is the next minute. Keep going. Here is my updates and reflection on 2024. The biggest thing for me has been my move and new ministry in Wisconsin. I said goodbye to two lovely rural Nebraska churches in February and started my new ministry in Wisconsin March 1. It was funny that I was actually attending a UCCB meeting in Ohio when I officially met my new conference minister in person on March 1. God has a sense of humor. This past 9 months has been learning about the systems of the church and the community and trying to find my place. I haven't been perfect in this, but I...
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