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So I Don't Fit - Literally; 1 Year Later

Today is the 1 year anniversary to me publishing my blog post “So I Don’t Fit – Literally.” It has been my most read and commented upon blog post. So I thought that it was time to revisit the topic and see if I had learned anything and/or if society had learned. I do not see society as having changed much. I am proud of my colleagues, who have published their own blogs and have taken on the issues of body image and even wrote a letter as a parent that went viral and even was on CNN. The conversation continues in America today about what beauty is and the standards we hold each other too. However, these prophetic voices are not enough to be a strong counter voice to a multi billion-dollar industry. I still am tempted to buy the very magazines that tell me I’m not pretty or fashionable because they have the money to be everywhere. What I do see as a step in the right direction is the willingness of more people to have this conversation about what is beautiful. Physically, since last ye...

Why Should the Church Care about Marriage?

Below is my submission to the GLAD Alliance 2014 Easter Writing Project. They can be found on Facebook and on their website if you would like to sign up to get these reflections. Why Should the Church care about Marriage? Easter writing project 2014 The state of Iowa just celebrated 5 years of legalizing civil unions. It was a moment that I was very proud of. The ruling to legalize civil unions has stood countless vows from the opposition to over turn the law. As a pastor, I have had to answer the question multiple times of “will you perform those?” and “what if your congregation won’t allow it in the building?” My answer has always been “yes” and “if it can’t be in one location, I’m sure God will be at another.” For me, as a straight female, the issue of why the Church, universal, should care about marriage is because it’s an issue of marking a special time in one’s life and social justice. Historically, marriage has and continues to be a matter of the State. The Church added litur...

The Personalization of Religious Freedom

My religious freedom in public, it's an interesting thing. Last week Kansas passed a law that allows business not to serve customers if it violates their religious freedom. This is heartbreaking news because if someone is or is not something that someone violates their religious belief (interracial marriage, LGBTQ in particular) a business can refuse services. I wonder who's religious freedom we're going to operate under? I mean I have various tattoos on my body that are expressions of my faith journey. What happens if a business owner in Kansas wants to state that tattoos are against their religious beliefs? Who's religious freedom is the winning hand? What if I choose to have a meal/coffee/go to a movie with a female friend? What if someone asks a questions about us - could we be lesbians? Could our possible lesbian appearance offend someone else's religious beliefs yet be something that's a fine to my sense of religion? Who's religious freedom rules the ...

Why I Am the Way that I Am

I have been asked, several times and in several different contexts, why I am the way that I am. As much as I wish that the answer of "I am a combination of DNA, social norms and mores and life experiences and life lessons" was enough. And well that is the short answer, it is rarely enough to fully answer that question. But what I find that's just as important as the question is the reason that the question is asked. Is it because I do not fit stereotypes or preconceived notions of who another thinks I should be? Does this person really want to get to know me on a deeper level? Is it an interview question? I believe that there are multiple reasons for why I've been asked this question, some with good intent and others not so much. So why does this question matter? I think part of it is about trying to understand the unexplainable. But I have to wonder why the question needs to be asked. Why not let someone be who they are? Why not honor the person as they are, wher...

Screaming at the Store

Having done my fair share of working in retail. With my current job it's not uncommon to make several trips (max I've hit is 5) in the same day to the store to take people shopping. So I'm generally not a fan of going back to the store after work. I ventured out on Saturday to go grocery shopping with my mom after work. While she shopped I walked around, getting a few things I needed for events upcoming, looking at the randomness that is holiday stuff. And then I started to listening to others were saying around me. Some were talking to children, others family and friends and then there was the "take a guess" crowd who were glued to their cell phones.The over arching theme of all of the conversations was this: I have to do this. I have to make this. We need this. We have to be here. We have to see all of these different places. What I found myself wanting to scream was "it all doesn't matter!" "It all doesn't matter." The business, th...

Hot Topic: Trayvon Martin

This past Saturday a verdict was rendered by 6 people on a jury in the Trayvon Martin murder case in Florida. Mr. Zimmerman was found not guilt. The country has been captivated by this case. A young, African American boy got into a fight with a white man who was on Neighborhood Watch. When things got out of control and Mr. Zimmerman believed his life was in danger he pulled out a gun, that was registered and Mr. Zimmerman had the permit to carry, and used it. Trayvon Martin died due to gun shots. It has become a case that has led to further scrutiny of race relations in America today. It has caused people to take a look at racial profiling. It has caused tensions to rise between those with power and those without. Here's what I know: this needs to be a time where communities and groups  come together to support each other and to  show love to everyone. Whether or not you agree with the verdict of the case, whether or not you believe that this was self defens...

At Girl Scout Camp

Last week, I was a volunteer at Girl Scout Camp. I went so a camper, who has physical conditions, could attend camp and get the medical assistance she needed. What I was looking for was some time away, catch up on some reading, get a little sun and making sure this camper had a good time. What really happened was all of the above and then some. One the second day of camp after getting sun burned, smelling like pool water, sunscreen, sweat and random craft stuff that was on me, a camper came up to me and said "you're pretty." That's it. Simple and to the point. Then she went back to whatever she had been working on. I don't know what led her to come up to someone who was basically a stranger to her and say "you're pretty" but she did. Short, simple and with honesty that only a child can have. It was moving to hear those words. Those two words made my night, made the sunburn more then worth it. They made me feel more loved then I've felt in a l...